Sometimes it is hard to figure out if someone is depressed or just feeling a little down. The same is true of the elderly. I would try to figure if the person was just having a bad time or was truly in need of help.
Thinking about this reminded me of Kay.
Kay was a very nice lady who had called me from the hospital. The doctor told her she could no longer live alone so she called and asked me to come and see her. I went there the next day and had a long talk with her. She was having a lot of problems breathing and the doctor was thinking of putting her on oxygen. She didn’t want to do this, she thought it would be terrible and she would die faster. I had a talk with the doctor and we decided to try oxygen just at night and see how that worked. Kay came to live with us in May and was very talkative. Her husband, he was a scientist, had died several years before. Kay had taught nursing at a college in NYC. She was on a lot of medicine but her mind was very good. She knew each pill and what it was for. Kay liked to joke a lot and was always trying to cheer people up.
One day she asked if I ever went to the track. I told her I didn’t but my husband went every night. She wanted to know if she could go. She said she loved going out to dinner and watch the races. I thought this was nice so I offered to take her. She really enjoyed my husband and they would get into some great discussions involving horses. We got reservations at the Club House for dinner and off we would go. Of course she had to have her portable oxygen on but she didn’t mind. My sister, Esther, would go with us because you never knew what was going to happen with Kay. I always took an extra tank along just in case we needed it.
One night, while at the track the oxygen started running quite low. I told her not to worry I would go to the car and get the extra. I went to the car, which was quite a ways, and discovered I had lost my keys!! I got a Security Guard to help me to see if we could get in through the window. He couldn’t do it and by now I was really worried. What if she ran out?? The Security Guard assured me the Doctor on the Track had oxygen in the First Aid office. Than someone noticed the back side window was open just a tiny bit. They managed to get a long rod through this and hit the unlock button!! I grabbed the extra tank and hurried back to the Clubhouse. It was really just in time because the other one was out. When I told Kay and Esther what happened my sister said, “Your keys are in your sweater pocket, hanging on the back of your chair”!!I had completely forgotten I had a sweater on that evening! It turned out to be a good evening anyway because Kay won $12.00 on a bet.
I noticed over the next few days she did not seem to be herself so I called the Doctor. He said she was depressed and prescribed a medicine for her.
I tell you, gentle reader, you just don’t know when this happens. He said she had been depressed for quite a long time but just tried to hide it. After she took her medicine you could see a change in her. She was lot of fun and never complained about anything. The one thing she enjoyed in the evening was a glass of Johnny Walker Red before she went to bed. The Doctor said if she wanted it she could have it and she did. Never more than one but it was her choice.
She was one of the people I will never forget. When I think about the people I had, gentle reader, I don’t think I will ever forget any of them.
They were all special in their own way and I just loved them.
Until the next time, gentle reader, remeber to count your blessings.
Love Red
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Thursday, September 4, 2008
JUST ANOTHER DAY
I had received a call from Saratoga Hospital about a room. There was a gentleman who could no longer live alone and wanted to meet me. I told Laura I would be there the following morning. I had recently remodeled and now had 5 bedrooms and five bathrooms, which sure made it a lot easier. The carpenter was almost finished so I thought I would be ok with getting another resident.
When I arrived at the hospital the next day I met Don. Don had Dementia (beginning stages) and was a very quiet gentleman. He had been married but his wife had died many years before so he tried to live by himself. The report said he had lived in one room for years, sleeping on a couch and eating TV dinners most of the time. His hair was down to his shoulders and so matted- you knew he hadn’t combed it in a looooong time! When I saw his toe nails I just could not believe it. They hadn’t been trimmed in months and were so long they curled.
I took him home and it was really interesting. The first thing I did was try to get him in a shower and what a battle that was.
“No woman was going to see him naked let alone give him a shower”!!I tried talking very quietly but after 15 minutes of that I got forceful. Melanie and I managed to get him undressed and in the shower. I had called Fran, my hairdresser, and she came to the house. When we got out of the shower she cut his hair. He was so mad at us he wouldn’t talk!! He looked about 10 years younger when we got through. Then I left him in his room saying his dinner would be ready in a little while. He never answered me so I knew we could have a big problem.
It was about a half hour later I went to the room to call him for dinner. What a surprise I got. He had turned on the TV and found the NYMETS playing and was so happy. I ended up fixing him a plate and letting him eat in his room and watch the game.
I always liked to have everyone together for meals but sometimes you bend the rules. This was one of those times. When the game was over and I wanted to get him ready for bed I expected a huge argument but he was great. Did not want to brush his teeth (found out he only had about six) otherwise he was fine. When his brother came to visit him the following week he couldn’t believe the change in him. He said he had tried for a long time to get him out of the apartment but Don wouldn’t leave. He was sure happy to see him being cared for. The only thing we had to wait for was Dr. Finger to come and trim his nails. He came the following week and Don was happy to get that done.
One of the most interesting things was that he couldn’t figure out where he was. When he got up the next morning he had forgotten completely where he was. He didn’t remember the shower, haircut or anything. That is the way dementia works which at times made our work easier. However it could also be the other way around.
If someone with dementia asked for a pain pill and you gave it to them, an hour later they didn’t remember and wanted another. It just kept us on our toes all the time.
Sometimes I swear I was getting forgetful so I would tell anyone who noticed” I am just rehearsing for Alzheimer’s so when I get it I will know how to act”!!
Keep smiling, dear reader, it always helps lighten the load.
Love Red
When I arrived at the hospital the next day I met Don. Don had Dementia (beginning stages) and was a very quiet gentleman. He had been married but his wife had died many years before so he tried to live by himself. The report said he had lived in one room for years, sleeping on a couch and eating TV dinners most of the time. His hair was down to his shoulders and so matted- you knew he hadn’t combed it in a looooong time! When I saw his toe nails I just could not believe it. They hadn’t been trimmed in months and were so long they curled.
I took him home and it was really interesting. The first thing I did was try to get him in a shower and what a battle that was.
“No woman was going to see him naked let alone give him a shower”!!I tried talking very quietly but after 15 minutes of that I got forceful. Melanie and I managed to get him undressed and in the shower. I had called Fran, my hairdresser, and she came to the house. When we got out of the shower she cut his hair. He was so mad at us he wouldn’t talk!! He looked about 10 years younger when we got through. Then I left him in his room saying his dinner would be ready in a little while. He never answered me so I knew we could have a big problem.
It was about a half hour later I went to the room to call him for dinner. What a surprise I got. He had turned on the TV and found the NYMETS playing and was so happy. I ended up fixing him a plate and letting him eat in his room and watch the game.
I always liked to have everyone together for meals but sometimes you bend the rules. This was one of those times. When the game was over and I wanted to get him ready for bed I expected a huge argument but he was great. Did not want to brush his teeth (found out he only had about six) otherwise he was fine. When his brother came to visit him the following week he couldn’t believe the change in him. He said he had tried for a long time to get him out of the apartment but Don wouldn’t leave. He was sure happy to see him being cared for. The only thing we had to wait for was Dr. Finger to come and trim his nails. He came the following week and Don was happy to get that done.
One of the most interesting things was that he couldn’t figure out where he was. When he got up the next morning he had forgotten completely where he was. He didn’t remember the shower, haircut or anything. That is the way dementia works which at times made our work easier. However it could also be the other way around.
If someone with dementia asked for a pain pill and you gave it to them, an hour later they didn’t remember and wanted another. It just kept us on our toes all the time.
Sometimes I swear I was getting forgetful so I would tell anyone who noticed” I am just rehearsing for Alzheimer’s so when I get it I will know how to act”!!
Keep smiling, dear reader, it always helps lighten the load.
Love Red
Friday, August 22, 2008
REFLECTIONS
I went to a funeral the other day. It was for a lady I had the privilege of helping to take care of for the last two years. It was a beautiful service. The sun was shining and a nice breeze blowing and you looked real hard you could see her listening to the beautiful service. Her grandson played his guitar and sang a song to her. They played a song from Celine Dion which just flowed over the church so beautifully. Than her other grandson said a few words about what she had taught him. It was so nice to hear about this lady I never knew before. When I cared for her she was always worrying about her husband and her family. You never heard her complain about herself. She just wanted everyone to be ok. She was so proud of her family.
I was so used to hearing people complain about their problems it became normal. I reflected about a lot of things on my way home. This family is so close to each other. They never argued or had cross words to say about each other or other people. When I was working and cooked a meal I was expected to eat with the family. I became a part of this family. All the caregivers were treated so nice.
Whenever I went to work it was with a smile on my face because I enjoyed all of the family so much. This lady had meals served at the table. There were candles and cloth napkins and everything looked so beautiful. Before every meal Norm said a prayer and then he would very gently kiss the back of her hand. There was no TV on and it was always nice conversations going. He called her Bunny and she called him Brer Rabbit and this had been going on for 68 years.
Thinking about these things made me realize how fast life goes. When you realize you forgot to stop and smell the roses than you know you better slow down.
Have you really been listening to other people or just going through the motions?
I never want to fall into that rut so I try to listen. When I am caring for someone I have to figure out what is really going on. Men never want to tell you. It is this thing about you can’t complain.
Men think they are invincible until something goes wrong. Then they deny it if you ask. Women usually will tell another woman their problems.
I know this is short but just remember, gentle reader, tell someone you love them or give someone a hug and kiss. Life is just so short and we all have a lot to do.
Until the next time,
Love Ruth
I was so used to hearing people complain about their problems it became normal. I reflected about a lot of things on my way home. This family is so close to each other. They never argued or had cross words to say about each other or other people. When I was working and cooked a meal I was expected to eat with the family. I became a part of this family. All the caregivers were treated so nice.
Whenever I went to work it was with a smile on my face because I enjoyed all of the family so much. This lady had meals served at the table. There were candles and cloth napkins and everything looked so beautiful. Before every meal Norm said a prayer and then he would very gently kiss the back of her hand. There was no TV on and it was always nice conversations going. He called her Bunny and she called him Brer Rabbit and this had been going on for 68 years.
Thinking about these things made me realize how fast life goes. When you realize you forgot to stop and smell the roses than you know you better slow down.
Have you really been listening to other people or just going through the motions?
I never want to fall into that rut so I try to listen. When I am caring for someone I have to figure out what is really going on. Men never want to tell you. It is this thing about you can’t complain.
Men think they are invincible until something goes wrong. Then they deny it if you ask. Women usually will tell another woman their problems.
I know this is short but just remember, gentle reader, tell someone you love them or give someone a hug and kiss. Life is just so short and we all have a lot to do.
Until the next time,
Love Ruth
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
DEMENTIA CAN BE GOOD
I have been very busy, gentle reader, but when I tell you why you will understand.
I got married on July 25th to a wonderful guy. It was a small wedding with friends and family. I figured the third time around was enough so I kept it simple. Everything was great and we only had one problem. The best man choked on a piece of steak and Pat Marrow tried the Heimlich maneuver but it didn’t work. Bella called the fire department but it came out so all ended well.
I remember when I done this maneuver a long time ago. One of the residents had choked on a hamburger and so I did it. The hamburger came right out and it scared him so bad he would never eat hamburger again!!
It was late in the evening when I received a phone call from the Saratoga Hospital. It seems there was a 92 year old lady in need of help and it had to be kept quiet. No one was to know she was with me. They said she had dementia but had been sexually abused for several years. I went to the hospital and picked her up. She was the saddest looking person you can imagine. She had to be about 5’8”and weighed about 110 lbs. It was like skin and bones with long scraggly hair. My heart went out to her and I just gave her a big hug and asked her if she would like to go home with me. She said she would so off we went. I had strict orders about anyone trying to locate her by phone or car so I was a little apprehensive.
I had German Sheppard’s and knew no one could drive in without the dogs barking. I informed Chris and Esther if anyone called we knew nothing.
The information I received about her was very sad. Her husband had died three years before and so she took in a border to help her out. The man she took in was in his early 50’s and he took everything she had. It only took him a few months to get her trust and then he started in on her. He would make out checks, have her sign them and then take her to the bank and have her cash them!! She would give the money to him and there was nothing illegal about it. Sometimes he took her out to eat and she just loved all the attention. Why her family didn’t notice what was going on was beyond me. After about 8 months of this he got so he didn’t let the family in. He would tell them she was sleeping and they left. Then he got her to tell the family she didn’t want them coming to visit anymore and so they left her with him. This woman had a very nice home and beautiful antiques. When her husband died he left her very well off and no bills to pay. The police figured she let him move in because she was lonely. He managed to mortgage her home by having her sign all the papers. During all this time he was also abusing her sexually. The only reason all this came out was because of a UPS driver.
When the UPS driver went to deliver a package he rang the bell. There were small windows beside the door and he glanced in to see if anyone was coming. The lady was on the couch, in a bad position, nude and that was all he needed. He called the police and the rest is history.
Mary had dementia and it was apparent she really didn’t know where she was but she was happy. We had to give her medicine to keep her from getting upset. She would get started on where her husband was and it was very hard. We would tell her he went to the store and she would cry. The best thing we found to help was have her help one of the other ladies. She loved to “fuss” with their hair so we had her doing everyone’s hair for a long time.
When her family was finally told where she was they came to visit. They were so happy to have her out of the house.
Mary lived with us for about a year and then one night she died in her sleep.
I always treasured her memory because it was nice knowing we helped someone who was truly in trouble.
The worst part was the man got away with everything and could not be charged with any crime. The bank foreclosed on the house and Mary lost everything she had.
The good part of Dementia was she never understood what she lost.
Until next time, dear read, have a great day & remember
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing.
LOVE RED
I got married on July 25th to a wonderful guy. It was a small wedding with friends and family. I figured the third time around was enough so I kept it simple. Everything was great and we only had one problem. The best man choked on a piece of steak and Pat Marrow tried the Heimlich maneuver but it didn’t work. Bella called the fire department but it came out so all ended well.
I remember when I done this maneuver a long time ago. One of the residents had choked on a hamburger and so I did it. The hamburger came right out and it scared him so bad he would never eat hamburger again!!
It was late in the evening when I received a phone call from the Saratoga Hospital. It seems there was a 92 year old lady in need of help and it had to be kept quiet. No one was to know she was with me. They said she had dementia but had been sexually abused for several years. I went to the hospital and picked her up. She was the saddest looking person you can imagine. She had to be about 5’8”and weighed about 110 lbs. It was like skin and bones with long scraggly hair. My heart went out to her and I just gave her a big hug and asked her if she would like to go home with me. She said she would so off we went. I had strict orders about anyone trying to locate her by phone or car so I was a little apprehensive.
I had German Sheppard’s and knew no one could drive in without the dogs barking. I informed Chris and Esther if anyone called we knew nothing.
The information I received about her was very sad. Her husband had died three years before and so she took in a border to help her out. The man she took in was in his early 50’s and he took everything she had. It only took him a few months to get her trust and then he started in on her. He would make out checks, have her sign them and then take her to the bank and have her cash them!! She would give the money to him and there was nothing illegal about it. Sometimes he took her out to eat and she just loved all the attention. Why her family didn’t notice what was going on was beyond me. After about 8 months of this he got so he didn’t let the family in. He would tell them she was sleeping and they left. Then he got her to tell the family she didn’t want them coming to visit anymore and so they left her with him. This woman had a very nice home and beautiful antiques. When her husband died he left her very well off and no bills to pay. The police figured she let him move in because she was lonely. He managed to mortgage her home by having her sign all the papers. During all this time he was also abusing her sexually. The only reason all this came out was because of a UPS driver.
When the UPS driver went to deliver a package he rang the bell. There were small windows beside the door and he glanced in to see if anyone was coming. The lady was on the couch, in a bad position, nude and that was all he needed. He called the police and the rest is history.
Mary had dementia and it was apparent she really didn’t know where she was but she was happy. We had to give her medicine to keep her from getting upset. She would get started on where her husband was and it was very hard. We would tell her he went to the store and she would cry. The best thing we found to help was have her help one of the other ladies. She loved to “fuss” with their hair so we had her doing everyone’s hair for a long time.
When her family was finally told where she was they came to visit. They were so happy to have her out of the house.
Mary lived with us for about a year and then one night she died in her sleep.
I always treasured her memory because it was nice knowing we helped someone who was truly in trouble.
The worst part was the man got away with everything and could not be charged with any crime. The bank foreclosed on the house and Mary lost everything she had.
The good part of Dementia was she never understood what she lost.
Until next time, dear read, have a great day & remember
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing.
LOVE RED
Thursday, July 10, 2008
NO NURSING HOME
I was asked many times why I never ran a nursing home. Once I got started in the business I had thought about it. The only problem I had was the people. How could I give the personal care if I opened a large facility? To my way of thinking if you had more than ten people you started to lose the personal touch. This is what the folks wanted and so I kept the numbers small. In my house we had five bedrooms and five bathrooms. On the far end were my private rooms. The people happiness was my mail concern.
It was about 15 years ago I had a doctor ask me an interesting question. He wanted to know if I was interested in going into a partnership with him. It was to purchase a nursing home about 20 miles away. I could run the place and he would be the main doctor. I asked him about having so many people and he said this is how you make the money. We purchase the business and cut the cost to the bone. Redo the menu and use the cheapest meals you can. Then cut the staff down and you’re on your way to make some serious money!! I think I thought about this for five minutes and told him to forget it. I wasn’t in the business to make money but to care for people. He really had a hard time understanding this. To me it was very simple; keep the residents down and you have plenty of time for personal care.
Then there was the attorney I met who was very interested in having me bring the elderly to him. He offered me a fee for anyone I could send his way. You know, gentle reader, I never called on him again. It was interesting to read a few years later he was disbarred for stealing funds from an elderly gentleman.
I had a lady one time that was really funny. She had arrived about nine o’clock in the evening. It seems she had a dislocated should and was in a brace. The family didn’t want her to stay alone so they brought her to my home. I finally got her settled in and she went to sleep about 11:30. I woke her for breakfast about 8:30 and she wasn’t hungry. I waited about fifteen minutes and tried again. She said she was not going to eat because she was going to die in a few hours. I told her to hang on and left the room. I returned in a few minutes with a long pad and pencil. She said “What in the world are you doing”? “Well, I explained, since you are going to die I need a favor: I am going to make out a list for you because you must be talking to God so you can show him the list”! She actually started laughing and of course she proceeded to get up.
You had to be able to respond with a good line just to get their mind off their problems.
When we had meals ready, if a couple of people weren’t at the table I would go in the living room and say, with a laugh, “Lunch is being served in the main dining room, on the first floor level” Everyone would just laugh about that. Sometimes I think, dear reader, Harold would lag behind just to hear me say it.
I had a lady named Selma who was Jewish. I tried to serve her only the foods she wanted. She never complained and was always so nice. One evening, when she had been with us for a couple of weeks I served pork chops. I had fixed her something else and when she saw the pork chops she said “I would like pork chops also”! I said “You may certainly have one. I thought you didn’t eat pork. She said “I cheat all the time, “and just smiled the nicest smile. It just goes to show you never knew what they would come up with.
Until the next time dear reader, you have a nice day and remember this:
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing
Love, Red
It was about 15 years ago I had a doctor ask me an interesting question. He wanted to know if I was interested in going into a partnership with him. It was to purchase a nursing home about 20 miles away. I could run the place and he would be the main doctor. I asked him about having so many people and he said this is how you make the money. We purchase the business and cut the cost to the bone. Redo the menu and use the cheapest meals you can. Then cut the staff down and you’re on your way to make some serious money!! I think I thought about this for five minutes and told him to forget it. I wasn’t in the business to make money but to care for people. He really had a hard time understanding this. To me it was very simple; keep the residents down and you have plenty of time for personal care.
Then there was the attorney I met who was very interested in having me bring the elderly to him. He offered me a fee for anyone I could send his way. You know, gentle reader, I never called on him again. It was interesting to read a few years later he was disbarred for stealing funds from an elderly gentleman.
I had a lady one time that was really funny. She had arrived about nine o’clock in the evening. It seems she had a dislocated should and was in a brace. The family didn’t want her to stay alone so they brought her to my home. I finally got her settled in and she went to sleep about 11:30. I woke her for breakfast about 8:30 and she wasn’t hungry. I waited about fifteen minutes and tried again. She said she was not going to eat because she was going to die in a few hours. I told her to hang on and left the room. I returned in a few minutes with a long pad and pencil. She said “What in the world are you doing”? “Well, I explained, since you are going to die I need a favor: I am going to make out a list for you because you must be talking to God so you can show him the list”! She actually started laughing and of course she proceeded to get up.
You had to be able to respond with a good line just to get their mind off their problems.
When we had meals ready, if a couple of people weren’t at the table I would go in the living room and say, with a laugh, “Lunch is being served in the main dining room, on the first floor level” Everyone would just laugh about that. Sometimes I think, dear reader, Harold would lag behind just to hear me say it.
I had a lady named Selma who was Jewish. I tried to serve her only the foods she wanted. She never complained and was always so nice. One evening, when she had been with us for a couple of weeks I served pork chops. I had fixed her something else and when she saw the pork chops she said “I would like pork chops also”! I said “You may certainly have one. I thought you didn’t eat pork. She said “I cheat all the time, “and just smiled the nicest smile. It just goes to show you never knew what they would come up with.
Until the next time dear reader, you have a nice day and remember this:
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing
Love, Red
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
ELECTRIC BLANKETS & NO POWER
It was a very cold and snowy day when Agnes came to my home. She was the fourth person to live with us. Agnes arrived with two suitcases and a couple of bags. She was a tall lady, little on the heavy side with long (I mean long) hair. She was dressed very classy in a suit consisting of skirt, blouse, and jacket. On her feet were stockings and a pair of low heeled pumps. . She also had on a pair of white gloves. Her Doctor had called me looking for a place for her. She had the beginning of dementia and could no longer live alone. She was talking as she came in and she never stopped. Every day she was dressed about the same. In the evening she wanted to wear long negligee but I finally convinced her was not a good idea with men around. Agnes had an answer for everything that went through the house. She had the cure for anything and everything. You could always get a good laugh at some of them; but she meant well. One thing about Agnes that got your attention was her illness. If you had a headache she got one immediately. If you’re back hurt, gentle reader, so did hers. If someone had a pain in their foot you know she did too. The Dr had told me she was a hypochondriac so I was prepared. She was on medicine for high blood pressure and for her heart. Agnes had a “sugar” pill. If she complained too much I would tell her I was going to have to get her a pain pill and she was so happy. When she took this capsule, which was just sugar her pain went away. She was a firm believer in the pill so this really worked out great for me. Agnes always set in a rocking chair filing her finger nails. It seemed like the more she talked the faster she would rock.
Her hair was a huge problem. She couldn’t brush it herself so I did the best I could. She couldn’t stand any heavy brushing and it was a job. I tried to get her to cut her hair but she refused any mention of this. I swear, dear reader, it was almost to her knees. She said she had not had it cut in fifty years and I believed her.
It was early spring when a thunderstorm developed. It was really a severe storm and the weatherman said it would last several hours. There was a lot of thunder and lighting. The folks always got together in the living room. It seemed to make everyone more comfortable to be with each other. The lights had blinked off and on a couple of times and then we lost power. You could literally hear a pin drop. I called Niagara Mohawk and they said power would be off for several hours.
I went into the living room and said very calmly “Everyone has to go to bed. The power will be off but I will be right here.” I figured if they were in bed it was easier to keep them quiet and no one was walking around in the dark. It took a while but I got the folks into their bed except Agnes. She said she just couldn’t go to bed she was in too much pain. I knew of course, gentle reader, she was fine but I said “Agnes, if you will go to bed I will get your special pill for you”! She rocked a few times and then said “Ok and than if you will plug in my electric blanket and turn it up I will go to bed”! Of course you know what I did… I gave her special pill and put her to bed. I than “fooled around” plugging in the blanket and she said “That feels so nice and warm and went to sleep. The power came back on about midnight but no one woke up. The next morning, dear reader, Agnes mentioned how well she slept with the blanket turned up on high!!
One of the best things I ever did in this home was to have an elevator installed. It was quite a job and we really had some interesting happen when people got on and forgot how to get off.
One of the funniest was when Agnes got on the elevator and started yelling for help. She was between floors and wanted to get off so she opened the door. This elevator had a “fail safe” feature and if the door opened it stopped wherever it was. It is hard to explain but there were two doors so she couldn’t get hurt. It took a long time to get her to shut the door so we could get her out. Of course as soon as she was out she got all the attention and she just lapped it right up. You would almost think, dear reader, she had thought of it herself.
To think, gentle reader, this was just the beginning of a long journey. Check in later for the next installment of life in the Miner Home…..
Love Red
Her hair was a huge problem. She couldn’t brush it herself so I did the best I could. She couldn’t stand any heavy brushing and it was a job. I tried to get her to cut her hair but she refused any mention of this. I swear, dear reader, it was almost to her knees. She said she had not had it cut in fifty years and I believed her.
It was early spring when a thunderstorm developed. It was really a severe storm and the weatherman said it would last several hours. There was a lot of thunder and lighting. The folks always got together in the living room. It seemed to make everyone more comfortable to be with each other. The lights had blinked off and on a couple of times and then we lost power. You could literally hear a pin drop. I called Niagara Mohawk and they said power would be off for several hours.
I went into the living room and said very calmly “Everyone has to go to bed. The power will be off but I will be right here.” I figured if they were in bed it was easier to keep them quiet and no one was walking around in the dark. It took a while but I got the folks into their bed except Agnes. She said she just couldn’t go to bed she was in too much pain. I knew of course, gentle reader, she was fine but I said “Agnes, if you will go to bed I will get your special pill for you”! She rocked a few times and then said “Ok and than if you will plug in my electric blanket and turn it up I will go to bed”! Of course you know what I did… I gave her special pill and put her to bed. I than “fooled around” plugging in the blanket and she said “That feels so nice and warm and went to sleep. The power came back on about midnight but no one woke up. The next morning, dear reader, Agnes mentioned how well she slept with the blanket turned up on high!!
One of the best things I ever did in this home was to have an elevator installed. It was quite a job and we really had some interesting happen when people got on and forgot how to get off.
One of the funniest was when Agnes got on the elevator and started yelling for help. She was between floors and wanted to get off so she opened the door. This elevator had a “fail safe” feature and if the door opened it stopped wherever it was. It is hard to explain but there were two doors so she couldn’t get hurt. It took a long time to get her to shut the door so we could get her out. Of course as soon as she was out she got all the attention and she just lapped it right up. You would almost think, dear reader, she had thought of it herself.
To think, gentle reader, this was just the beginning of a long journey. Check in later for the next installment of life in the Miner Home…..
Love Red
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
WEDDING DRESSES
“You know, Violet you would look better in my dress”!! I look in the room and there is Violet, with just a slip on and Mary sitting on her bed smiling. Mary says, very happily, “I am helping Violet with a dress for her wedding”!! I said, “I didn’t know Violet was getting married”! Violet speaks up and says” OH!! It is a surprise and no one is supposed to know”. I said “Who is the lucky man?” Than Violet told me how she met him many years ago at the church. She told me how he always liked her and told her someday he would marry her. Now, gentle reader, you must realize, Violet was not the brightest person but she believed in people. She wanted to make sure she looked ok if he should come to visit. Violet had been waiting years for this but to her it was like yesterday. Her face lit up talking about him and she just looked so very happy! It just made me love her all the more. ):>)!! Mary and Violet spent many days just trying on each other’s clothes. It was a big joke to some but I always smile when I remember those two.
They were as different as night and day. I had written about Mary before. She is the lady who was just beautiful for her age and had never married. Violet had never married either but her Father was a minister and she was raised mostly by him. She was very shy around people but after she was with us for a while she was ok with everyone. She just truly believed he was going to arrive.
It was a lot different for Helen and Francis. These two shared a room. I never really had a problem with two women sharing a room but, gentle reader, this was really different. They both wore the same size clothing and Helen was always putting on Francis’s slacks. The first thing you heard was “Helen, you have my slacks on”! Helen replied “No I don’t. I looked and the tag says their mine”. Francis would say,” I want to see”. Helen would show her the tag and ninety percent of the time it was Francis’s pants. Francis wanted her to change immediately and someone had to go with her because by the time she got them off she would forget and put them right back on. When people are diagnosed with dementia it was hard. Some folks were not too bad but others were really a sad case. You just have to have world of patience with them. I think this is where the saying ” patience is a virtue” comes in.
When it came to men sharing a room it could really get interesting. You would never believe how bashful they were with each other. It seemed like one would go to bed early and the other would stay up watching TV. Than when he would go to bed you would hear “Shut the light off I am sleeping”!! I didn’t allow smoking in the house and sure enough one would want to go out for a cigarette. Than it was “I hate the smell of smoke”!!You need to take a bath.””Can someone spray something to get rid of the smell”?
I am sure, gentle reader; you understand how different it was.
I had folks with Dementia, Alzheimer’s, Cancer, Parkinson and many others. They would treat each other with a lot of respect but sometimes they could get angry. There is a huge difference between Dementia and Alzheimer’s. Folks who had Dementia were usually very easy to get to do things. They could sit and watch TV or look at a magazine but with Alzheimer’s it was a whole new ballgame. They normally paced a lot and ask the same thing. When you had to answer the same question 30 or 40 times a day you were glad when your shift was over. I was lucky with the ones I had.
I did have one Alzheimer’s person who really put me thru my paces!!
That is a story for the next time, gentle reader, and so check back in a few days…..
Love, Red
They were as different as night and day. I had written about Mary before. She is the lady who was just beautiful for her age and had never married. Violet had never married either but her Father was a minister and she was raised mostly by him. She was very shy around people but after she was with us for a while she was ok with everyone. She just truly believed he was going to arrive.
It was a lot different for Helen and Francis. These two shared a room. I never really had a problem with two women sharing a room but, gentle reader, this was really different. They both wore the same size clothing and Helen was always putting on Francis’s slacks. The first thing you heard was “Helen, you have my slacks on”! Helen replied “No I don’t. I looked and the tag says their mine”. Francis would say,” I want to see”. Helen would show her the tag and ninety percent of the time it was Francis’s pants. Francis wanted her to change immediately and someone had to go with her because by the time she got them off she would forget and put them right back on. When people are diagnosed with dementia it was hard. Some folks were not too bad but others were really a sad case. You just have to have world of patience with them. I think this is where the saying ” patience is a virtue” comes in.
When it came to men sharing a room it could really get interesting. You would never believe how bashful they were with each other. It seemed like one would go to bed early and the other would stay up watching TV. Than when he would go to bed you would hear “Shut the light off I am sleeping”!! I didn’t allow smoking in the house and sure enough one would want to go out for a cigarette. Than it was “I hate the smell of smoke”!!You need to take a bath.””Can someone spray something to get rid of the smell”?
I am sure, gentle reader; you understand how different it was.
I had folks with Dementia, Alzheimer’s, Cancer, Parkinson and many others. They would treat each other with a lot of respect but sometimes they could get angry. There is a huge difference between Dementia and Alzheimer’s. Folks who had Dementia were usually very easy to get to do things. They could sit and watch TV or look at a magazine but with Alzheimer’s it was a whole new ballgame. They normally paced a lot and ask the same thing. When you had to answer the same question 30 or 40 times a day you were glad when your shift was over. I was lucky with the ones I had.
I did have one Alzheimer’s person who really put me thru my paces!!
That is a story for the next time, gentle reader, and so check back in a few days…..
Love, Red
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